I've heard about being sick and feeling depressed. But only lately, I started realising how it feels. Since I was about 18, I began complaining about having pain on my left shoulder. Complains went on for years. No one could tell what was wrong with me and why was I having that pain. Then, in 2011, I went for my first MRI and CT-Scan. That's when I got to know that I have scoliosis. But usually scoilosis wouldn't cause much pain. Unfortunately I was suffering with severe shoulder pain. The doctor said that I'm too young to have this condition, and only injection or surgery could correct it. However, it is too risky as I'm young. So, I started depending on painkillers and inflammatory ointment as my shoulder gets swollen. After I left to Melbourne, my pain seemed to get worse, especially during winter. Last year, I consulted three doctors for the pain and took another MRI. This time the MRI results answered the cause of my pain and swelling. But until now, I haven't got a proper solution for it. At times, I feel like giving up. I hardly sleep well because of the pain. I end up taking naps and feeling weak. Every doctor comes up with something new and says one thing until I started googling for solutions. The pain does cause depression. I feel moody, easily irritated. I only feel comfortable only with some people. It is true, physical pain and illness could lead to depression. Till we get a good solution, we can hardly feel better. Somehow we gotta be strong and keep finding for a solution.
So, all I could say is believe in yourself, and take control of your pain and keep fighting. Don't expect anyone to understand what you are going through because it would only lead to disappointment at times.
Good night dear readers :)
